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Back For when someone has died

Support

Who to call, where to get counselling, and what leave you're entitled to.

You don't have to do this alone. If you need someone to talk to, the numbers below are free and available now. For longer-term support, there are good options too.

Crisis lines — available now

Service Contact
Need to talk? (free, 24/7)1737 (call or text)
Lifeline0800 543 354
Samaritans0800 726 666
Youthline0800 376 633

Bereavement support

Service What they offer Cost
Hospice NZBereavement support, typically for up to 12 months after a death. Contact your local hospice.Free
Skylight TrustGrief support, counselling, resources for adults and children.Counselling from around $120 to $150 per session. Subsidies may be available.
The Grief CentreSupport groups and counselling — face-to-face, phone, or video.Varies
EAP (via your employer)Short-term counselling — ask your HR team.Free (employer-funded)
Aoake te RaSupport for those who have lost someone to suicide.Free

Support for children

Service What
Skylight TrustResources and programmes for grieving children and young people
Kenzie's GiftChild bereavement support
Cloud WorkshopFree, Auckland, ages 5–18
Seasons for GrowthSchool-based grief programme
Mana AkeWellbeing support in Canterbury schools

Bereavement leave

Under the Holidays Act 2003, if you have been employed for 6 months or more:

Relationship to the deceased Leave
Spouse/partner, parent, child, sibling, grandparent, grandchild, spouse's parent3 days
Other person (if employer accepts you have suffered a bereavement)1 day

3 days is not enough. Most people need more time. Talk to your employer — many will offer additional leave, flexible working, or unpaid leave. Your EAP service can also help you navigate this conversation.

For employers

If you're an employer and a staff member has been bereaved:

  • Bereavement leave is a minimum, not a target. Three days is rarely enough. Consider offering additional paid leave, flexible hours, or a phased return.
  • Tangihanga and Pacific mourning practices require more than 3 days. Be aware of your employee's cultural needs.
  • Tell them about EAP. Many employees don't know they have access to free counselling through your Employee Assistance Programme.
  • Reduce the admin burden. Handle as much internal paperwork as you can without requiring their input. Let them know about any group life insurance or death-in-service benefit.
  • Check in after they return. The first few weeks back are often the hardest. A brief, private conversation goes further than a card.
  • Be flexible on performance. Grief affects concentration, memory, and energy for months. Adjust expectations quietly.

If a staff member has been bereaved, point them to whatever practical guidance helps. The steps after a death are a lot to hold in your head at once.

Cultural & religious support

Tangihanga, Pacific mourning customs, and religious funeral requirements all have specific practices and timelines. We have a dedicated guide covering Māori, Samoan, Tongan, Muslim, Jewish, Hindu, Buddhist, Sikh, and Christian customs.

Cultural & religious guidance →

Sources

Bereavement leave: Holidays Act 2003 · Support services: govt.nz

The information on this page is general in nature and does not constitute legal, financial, or medical advice. For advice specific to your situation, consult a qualified professional.

Dollar figures and entitlements change periodically. We link to authoritative sources where possible. Last reviewed: July 2026.