What to do with their things

• Check the will first. It may specify who gets particular items (jewellery, taonga, furniture). The executor has a legal obligation to follow these instructions.
• Don't throw things away in the first few weeks. Grief makes you want to clear everything or keep everything. Both impulses settle down. Give yourself time before making permanent decisions.
• Secure valuables early. Jewellery, cash, important documents, taonga — put these somewhere safe until the estate is sorted.
• Check pockets, drawers, and envelopes. People hide things — cash in coat pockets, documents in books, keys in drawers. Go through things carefully.

This is where families can fall out. A few things that help:

• Follow the will. If it says who gets what, that's the answer — even if someone disagrees.
• If there's no will (or it doesn't mention belongings), the executor decides. Have a conversation with family before you start. Let people say what matters to them.
• Take turns choosing. If multiple people want different things, a simple system: each person picks one item in rotation until everything is claimed.
• Photograph everything first. Before anything is moved, take photos room by room. This prevents disputes later and helps with insurance or estate valuation.
• Let people take their time. Not everyone processes at the same speed. Give family members a deadline (say, 4–6 weeks) to say what they'd like, then deal with the rest.
• Some things have more emotional value than financial value. A worn cardigan can matter more than a piece of furniture. Ask people what they want to remember them by — the answer is often surprising.

This is one of the hardest parts. Their clothes still smell like them. There's no right time to do this.

• Keep what you want. A favourite jumper, a scarf, a pair of shoes. You don't need a reason.
• Donate the rest — Salvation Army, Hospice shops, Women's Refuge, City Mission. They'll often collect for free if it's a large amount.
• Some people make things from clothes — quilts, cushion covers, teddy bears. There are services in NZ that do this.
• If you can't face it, ask someone else. A friend, a sibling, someone who's slightly less close to the grief. They can sort, you can approve.

• Offer to family first, then friends
• Sell online — Trade Me, Facebook Marketplace. Price to move, not to profit — the goal is to clear the house, not maximise returns.
• Donate — Salvation Army, Habitat for Humanity ReStore, Hospice shops
• House clearance services — some companies will clear an entire house for a fee (or sometimes free if the items have resale value). Google "house clearance [your city]".
• Skip bin — for things that can't be donated or sold. Council may offer bulky waste collection too.

• If they owned it — the executor manages the property as part of the estate. See settling the estate.
• If they were renting — check the tenancy agreement. You'll typically need to give 21 days' notice. The landlord must return the bond minus any legitimate costs. Remove belongings before you hand back the keys.
• If they were in a rest home — the facility will usually give you a reasonable time to clear the room (typically 2–4 weeks).
• Redirect mail — set up redirection with NZ Post so nothing important goes to an empty house.
• Insurance — keep house and contents insurance active until the property is sold or transferred. An empty house may need a policy change — tell the insurer.